Ask anyone who is about to get married what is their number 1 concern, most will tell you its the cost of the darn thing. Some weddings can cost up to RM200,000, as much as an entry level German luxury car. At least the car can last you a few years, but your wedding will likely last a few hours.
So why are weddings such a wealth killin, credit card bursting event that will send your banker running for the hills? Well, I think it stems from the expectation that this is a once a lifetime thing, most people pull out all the stops. Monica Geller once asked Ross along the lines of 'You may think of the wedding for about a month, she has been thinking about it since she was five'. Five, a time where unicorns roam the skies, and animals will sing with you. Hardly a good time to make financial decisions.
Prewedding shoots? Lets do it in the Bahamas.
Decorations? Fresh flowers from Holland.
Guest Entertainment. Lets get "insert your favorite local band/singers here"
Wedding car? Horse Carriage
Gown? Oh Gown. Vera Wang summer collection 2017.
Suits? Armani. Its my big day bro.
Wedding location? Must be garden wedding with 4 Tier cake. Fresh rose petals on the ground
The above may sound a bit over the top, it is what I have heard from friends and family who are about to get hitched. At least before they get a heart attack after knowing how much a Vera Wang gown will cost.
The list keeps growing, and before long, you are looking at a 6 figure number. If you survive that heart attack just now, you may not survive it now.
I got married 5 years ago, no stranger to expectations from spouse, in laws, relatives, friends, Hollywood, Kdramas, Jdramas, Bollywood, even my own. The first thing my wife wanted was a garden wedding. Newsflash! Malaysia is hot and humid with the occasional torrential downpour. Our guests will be sweating all the time. Or if it starts to rain, your white expensive heels are going to be ruined. We were married in October, not haze season. So I didn't need to get a box of air filters. Pretty sure i look good in an N95 mask.
I've list down a few things to consider if you want to keep the cost under control. You do not want to appear cheap, but there are a few things you may forgo or optimize without looking too obvious, giving your bank account some breathing space.
Wedding studios will take 1000s of pictures during your photo session and they hope that when you choose your photos, you will want to print more than what is allocated for your chosen package. Many couples i know also take packages that have too many printouts. Ie: 50" poster x 3. 40" poster x 3, 36" x 5. So on. Well its good to print some and hang them in your house, take it from somebody who is already married, you will not hang too many of them. 1 in the bedroom and that is pretty much it. Guess where the other printouts end up? Underneath the bed collecting dust. What about photo books? Well, 1-2 should suffice. I display them on my coffee table in my living room. Anything more than that will likely end up together with the posters.
Potential savings: RM1000-3000
Location of Your Photo Shoots
Do you really need that photoshoot to be in Gold Coast Australia? It is very tiring, expensive as you have to fly the crew there, and you hardly enjoy the trip. I took my wedding photos in a studio in SS2 with some pretty amazing backdrops, saved tons of money, flew to New Zealand for Honeymoon and had ourselves a good time. Took tons of photos there by ourselves.
Potential savings: A lot. Depends on where you want. Bahamas will be more expensive than say, Sekinchan.
Wedding Gown and Suits
A few of my friends custom made their wedding gown at a cost of 5-15k. Well for something that you wear once and probably won't fit anymore after your first kid, do you really need to have them custom made? Guess where they end up after your wedding? Yes, collecting dust somewhere either in the cabinet or under the bed. A good friend of mine who is married for 12 years was just wondering what to do with her wedding dress. Too expensive to throw away, won't fit anymore, white has turned yellow-ish after 12 years, takes up too much room in the wardrobe.
Lots of wedding studios i know provide gown/suits rental that is part of your pre-wedding shoot package. Shop around for one that has the gown/suits you like. Most wedding studios allow you to view their selections and try them on before you decide to sign with them. Select a package that includes
i) Gowns/suits rental on your wedding night and other ceromonies
ii) Car decoration service
iii) 1-2 Multimedia shows
Potential savings: RM5000-15000
Engagement Ring and Wedding Ring
Before my wedding, I never knew that there is a difference between engagement ring & wedding ring. Wonder who came up with that rule. My wife & I, we have 1 set only. A solitaire diamond ring for her, and a simple ring for me. Use the same ring to propose and the wedding ceremony. Classic case of those that care won't matter, and those that matter won't care.
Potential savings: RM 1000-4000
Wedding Dinner
Find a restaurant or hotel that not only serves good food, but provides sound systems, projectors and decorations at no added cost. Some even provide basic Emcee-ing, door gifts in the form of Beryl Heart shaped chocolates in lovely little boxes and invitation cards too if you book above a certain number of tables. Key is to shop around.
Do you really need that Photo Booth or the display table with Cup Cakes when they are about to have a 5-10 course meal in 30 minutes?
Potential savings: Too much to count here. Probably RM10000-15000.
Band/singers
Many wedding dinners that i have attended do not have singers/bands. I don't remember walking away disappointed because of that. The food quality and the conversations during the dinner matter more. Good thing my wife didn't ask for this.
This is a double whammy because if you want your band to sing at your wedding, you are not allowed to use the built in PA system of the venue. So you have to rent a PA system of sufficient quality to ensure your guest don't get a headache after dish number 5.
Potential savings: RM5000-8000 ( Band and PA System )
There you go. Stay Tuned for Part Deux. Feel free to pass this on. Do drop a comment or two on what you think. Perhaps potential savings are too high. Perhaps there are more things you can cut down, or you would rather not. Let us know
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